Tag Archives: canon

And you lot thought I was a canon nazi ;)

This is not a canon.

A nice thick shaft and some big balls.

Me, I’m actually very forgiving when it comes to canon. I have to be, because I slash. If I want to slash Edward pre-Twilight (which I’ve done a fair bit), in order to be canon-compliant, I have to assume that Edward was lying to Bella in the meadow. Which I’ve always seen as being quite feasible, because honestly, is he really going to tell his 17 year old virginal human girlfriend that he was shagging his ‘father’ way back in the day?

Yeah, nah (<—that’s kiwi, that is).

As I interact more with some of the vampfic authors around that aren’t strictly slash writers, I’m coming to realise that my own canon standards are pretty lax. Lacking even. They likely look at me like I look at twi-vamps that bleed ;)

I’m okay with that, because I write slash. I like writing slash. I don’t have a particular issue with cheating in fics (yeah, I’m a minority there, I know) as long as it’s not too far fetched, so I’ll happily imagine Emmett and Edward screwing on their hunting trips, Jasper driving Edward mad with lust using his gift, Carlisle and Edward unable to let go of the relationship they had before Esme came along, and Edward and Jacob sucking each other off in the tent unbeknownst to sleeping Bella ;)

I’ve said it before. I don’t give a rats arse about canon pairings ;)

Timeline, yeah. Mythology (SM’s world) hell the fuck yeah (almost a non-negotiable when I’m writing, even if I’m way AU). But pairings? Meh. As long as no one breaks up or dies and it all fits with the Bella POV we were given in the four books of the Saga, I’m entirely comfortable with calling my shit canon.

I don’t own the illustrated guide or whatever it’s called. I don’t pay much attention to Steph’s ‘personal correspondence’ or interviews or whatever. It’s donkey’s since I bothered looking at Midnight Sun. I’ll concede that within the AH and/or slash corners of the fandom, I’m considered a little extreme. But me? Apparently not a canon nazi ;)

What got me thinking about it is The Canon Tour. solareclipses is bringing us a series of contests focusing on canon and AU fic. If you thought writing canon within the VampSlash contest was a challenge, slashing for The Canon Tour is gonna be very, very challenging. You’re likely going to be hard pressed to pull off an Edward/Jasper in this contest. I couldn’t do it. For a start I’m too lazy to lay down the backstory ;)

Honestly, it freaked me out a little. Me, canon nazi, not being able to write for a canon contest? Unthinkable!

It’s totally possible. Totally doable. Lots of mysterious years and mysterious characters to play with. If only I had the time *sigh*

There’s another canon contest going on right now, The Cullen Swingers contest. Must be canon, must be vamp, must be Cullens, must be shagging someone other than their own spouse, but I think PJ is a little more relaxed than even me about monogamy (in fiction!) :)

So I figure between those two vastly different contests anyone can write themselves a bit of canon slash.

Me, I’m trying to figure out where I’ll fit best.

(and don’t forget to vote in The Twifestivals!)

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Canon vs Cannon: Vampires, not Guns

If you were on twitter this morning (NZ time) you might have caught me on my high horse again. As long as that horse is still living, I’m gonna keep flogging it, it seems.

Who else is having dirty thoughts right now? Just me? Alright, let’s continue.

In my bloggy travels this morning I came across a particular spelling error that sets my teeth on edge, makes me cringe, and generally sends me flying to twitter with my rant firmly in tow.

OMFG PEOPLE!!! CANON! Not cannon. For the fucking millionth time!!!

Oh yes, I was in fine form, as you can see.

Yes, there is a difference, and quite a marked difference. I’ve been asked exactly what that difference is on many occasions, and here we have it:

Canon = vampires


Cannon = a bloody great gun


Okay, so even that could be a little confusing. Cannons are always bloody great guns (unless you’re in the Harry Potter fandom, and then I believe they could be a Quiddich team? But we’re not, so unless you’re writing Civil War era or similar, I’d be very surprised to see anything resembling a cannon in your twific), but canon doesn’t necessarily mean vampires outside of the Twilight fandom.

So I went dictionarying.
(I’m picking out the appropriate bits, feel free to clicky to see the entire entry)


– the works of an author that have been accepted as authentic: There are 37 plays in the Shakespeare canon.
– ( often plural )
a principle or accepted criterion applied in a branch of learning or art
– a list of writings, esp sacred writings, officially recognized as genuine
– a list of the works of an author that are accepted as authentic

[Old English, from Latin, from Greek kanōn rule, rod for measuring,standard; related to kanna reed, cane]

Apart from the above, there’s a whole bunch about church law and stuff. No bloody great guns, interestingly.

– a mounted gun for firing heavy projectiles; a gun, howitzer, or mortar.

[from Old French canon, from Italian cannone cannon, large tube, from canna tube, cane]

Well that was pretty much about the size of it. Some confusion can perhaps be gained from the fact that the part of a bit that goes in a horses mouth is called both cannon bit and canon bit. Also, interestingly enough both words seem like they may have come from the same place (cane).

But, no mention of guns in the ‘canon’ entry, and no mention of authenticity in the ‘cannon’ entry.

Oxford Dictionaries Online

…a general law, rule, principle, or criterion by which something is judged…

A whole 3 entries on this page, and that is right there at the top.

– (plural usually same) a large, heavy piece of artillery, typically mounted on wheels, formerly used in warfare.

Guns and some stuff about billiards and snooker on this page.

So where do the vampires come in??

I was getting bored with all that dictionary stuff anyway *yawn*

Well, you know up there where it says something about ‘the works of an author that have been accepted as authentic’ in the canon definition? Well those works, for those of us writing Twilight fanfiction, are obviously that of Stephenie Meyer. The Twilight Saga, to be specific. Funnily enough, The Twilight Saga has vampires in it! No! You don’t say!

*nods* Yep. So, if you’re describing a fic as CANON*, there better be vampires.

If you’re describing a fic as CANNON, there had better be fucking big guns.

*because the unfortunate misuse I witnessed this morning was more than just a spelling error, I must say again that canon pairing does not equal canon fic. Please, describe it as a ‘canon pairing fic’, but do not describe it as a ‘canon fic’. You’ll just look like a twit. And make me blog about it yet again. This horse is dead, and I’m done flogging. Kthxbai.

Just before I go, I’m going to remind you to go vote in The Slash Awards (Lost Boys got nom’d! SQUEE!!) and let you know that The Twifestivals (for lesser-known twislash) is taking nominations as of tomorrow. That concludes tonight’s pimpage.

New Story: The Way of Virtue

Summary: Perhaps it is his outward youth that intrigues me, knowing the experience that resides within. Alec was over a thousand years old when I was born to my human life, yet I look at him and see a compellingly beautiful child. Carlisle/Alec. Slash. NC-17. Canon.

Warnings: Intergenerational sex (consensual).

A/N: This story was written months ago, originally for the Beyond the Pale contest. I wrote two stories, then picked one. The one that I entered was Fire, Blood, Truth. The reason I didn’t pick The Way of Virtue, was because I was concerned that Carlisle paired with Alec as I write him would be…too beyond the pale ;) Of course, in a couple of ways, this story is far less taboo than the other one.

Read it on FanFiction.net or TwiWrite.

I’m going to get a reputation for being a right perv, soon. Maybe I already have ;)

While I’m here, I have to pimp Numb, by afragilelittlehuman. She wrote it for me in the Make the Yuletwi’d Gay slashy fic exchange, and indulged my love of Alec, this time in his damn-close-to-canon vampire form. Oh, and Edward, too :D

The All-Human Phenomenon in Twific

The weirdest thing to me when I entered the Twilight fic fandom, was the enormous number of AH (all human) fanfics. I’d only ever been in one other fandom (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, many many years ago), and AH was there, but it was so minimal, and I never read it. I didn’t see the point. I was in the fandom because I loved Joss’s world, the vampires, the demons, the characters, yes, but they never would have been anything like what they were without all the fantasy and supernatural that went with it.

I made an observation on twitter today, having just posted a canon story yesterday, and looking at the review counts on some of my stories.

My canon fics get less than half the average reviews as my AH E/J stuff on FFn, yet I think the canon stuff is better.

It started quite an interesting discussion on why AH fics are more popular.

LyricalKris suggested it’s because so few authors know how to write the Twilight vampires. That’s true, yeah, it is rare to find canon and AU (alternate universe) fics where the author hasn’t taken strange liberties with the Twilight vampire canon. I’ve seen vampires who bleed, those who don’t sparkle in the sun, those without their canon gifts. In AU it doesn’t bother me, if it’s done intentionally, but out of a lack of interest or knowledge of the source material, it’s just wrong.

Thing is, I don’t really understand why it’s so hard to get these details right. You’ve read the books, right? And if you can’t remember accurately what or how, then pick up that damn book and double check.

Of course, I’m a vampire canon nazi. I remember so often back in my Buffy days, I’d be reading a fic and then Angel would start crying tears of blood. Instaflounce. (In case you’ve never watched Buffy, the Buffyverse vamps do cry, but regular tears. Blood tears is an Anne Rice thing.) You’d better not have your Twivamps crying anything, if you want me to keep reading! I’ve used dry sobs, myself, but I try not to have my boys do it too much. No one likes a girly character in a slash fic ;)

But, the mere inability—or fear, as I’ve often heard expressed—to write accurate vampires can’t be the only reason why there’s so much AH.

One thing I’ve heard from twifans a whole lot, even way back before I ventured toward Twilight fanfiction, was the fact that they’d never been into vampires before. A lot hated vampire fiction/TV/movies. Even resisted Twilight because of the vampires, but when they eventually caved they were hooked by…Edward? The romance? The characters?

Now, this is a valid reason why AH fic could be so popular in our fandom.

I’m assuming that those of us who were into vampires and fantasy and supernatural before we read Twilight (I only read it because of the vampires), are the ones who are reading and writing the canon and AU fics?

After our wonderful discussion today, I figure in a lot of cases it’s how we see the Twilight story that affects what kinds of fics we like to read or write. To some, it’s a love story between a girl and a boy, and the fact that one of them is a vampire doesn’t much come into it. To others (or perhaps I should just speak for myself), it is the conflict in the relationship between a human, and a vampire who thirsts for the human’s blood.

Angst, man, fuck yeah!

Of course, being a slash writer, I don’t write about a vampire that thirsts for the blood of a human girl. I write other types of forbidden or doomed to failure relationships. Mortal enemies and father figure stuff. I’m comfortable with my deviancy :D

So. This is what I’ve learnt today.

  • I prefer AH = I came for the romance, not the vampires.
  • I prefer Canon/AU =  Give me the vampires!

Of course we aren’t all going to fall into one camp or another. There’s a lot of crossover. I’ve written AH (but admittedly the only reason I did it that first time was to have somewhere to post and get feedback on a piece of original fiction smut – yeah, I changed the names), I’ve written a lot of AH. But I’m not really interested in reading or writing it now. I love SM’s vampires. They’re pretty unique, as vampires go. I love Edward with the back-story Steph gave him. And I’ve become rather fond of her wolves, as well (I never had any interest in shapeshifters before).

In case you haven’t figured it out, I’m in the vampires camp, which is why I put together the Canon/AU Slash List. Because AH fic is so prevalent here, it can be hard to find the good vamp and wolf fics among them.

I do feel so much better now that I understand a little more why AH might be so popular around here. Thanks so much to my twitter friends, LyricalKris, ICMezzo, CereuleanBlue, evilgiraFF, hidingfromsome1, and HammerHips for talking to me about it!

So, where do you sit on the scale? Strict canon, all human, or somewhere in between? Why do you think you read/write the genre you prefer?

Slash list updated…

Finally! I’m slowly getting through the urls I hoarded all through November, I’ve still got a ton to look at, but since I’ve been slowly adding to the html file on my computer I thought I might as well update the list.

Canon/AU Slash List

As ever, send me links to canon and AU slash that isn’t on the list, I don’t care if it’s your fic or someone elses as long as it’s not all human!

And if you find any dead links, let me know so I can fix them!

I think I can, I think I can…

A photo of a cup of coffee.

Insert Random Photo. Zemanta is cool, no?

Since I’m all about the lists and spreadsheets and crossing stuff off said lists lately I thought I should make a wee one of those in regards to all the fanfic stuff I HAVE to do and soon.

And I’m putting it here, cos here is a whole lot prettier more permanent than a torn and coffee stained piece of paper on my desk that will then get lost and/or thrown away :D

  • Yuletwi’d fic to revise/edit/get beta’d (deadline approaches *flail*)
  • Update the Canon/AU Slash List (I have a month long backlog of fics to review)
  • Alec POV SSE outtake that I promised to the reviewers who pushed me over the 500 threshhold
  • Probably should write some more Beautiful Dangerous…

Slowly but surely…

Canon/AU fic list update

Added recently:

Misguided Angel (human Edward/vamp Jasper) by goldenmeadow, author of the epic Dead Confederates.

Fire in the Blood, a dark Sethward from the author of Once we were Kings, sweetp-1.